Playful Liberation

An Interview with Sonnei Ray

Sonnei Ray is a drag artist based in Portland, Oregon with a growing following. Their ability to go from jaw-dropping femme queen to clown artistry, both in aesthetic and character, tickles the mind and teases away the constructs and norms we blindly live by. Their presence is a welcome escape for those of us who tire of/don’t fit into those norms. From how they first entered the scene, to political activism, Sonnei guided me through their story.

Laura Creamer: I’m going to start with a big and maybe dumb question that probably has many different answers, but I’m interested in your answer: What is drag?

Sonnei Ray: My perception—drag hasn’t always been a loose term or an umbrella term like it is today…in the Shakespeare era, the term was used to reference men who were “dressed as girls.”

To me, in the modern world, drag is a word that describes a particular medium of art, like watercolor or oil paint are different mediums. Drag is a medium for dress up, makeup, etc., with a specific emphasis on gender. I don’t feel like drag means becoming a different gender from what you present as regularly, but rather an amplified or more dramatic version of it.

Sometimes artists choose to blur the lines of gender entirely, and sometimes the goal is to really fixate on specific stereotypes that exist. My personal favorite approach to drag is to be playful and in touch with the imagination I had as a child playing dress up. 

Drag is for everyone.

Laura: I love this answer. I also love makeup and I like to play with colors and shapes on my face. When my daughters (ages four and six) see me doing this, they want to play too. I’m glad they get to see me just having fun with it, and every time they find me at my vanity, they demand kitty whiskers. To view drag as adults who gender-bend and like to play dress-up is so pure.

So, what is it that drew you into drag and what is it that keeps you there?

Sonnei: Well, realistically, it started super early. I was always obsessed with dressing up, but my first real memory of knowing it was drag that I wanted to do (not just Halloween or whatever) was in high school. I was inspired by Marilyn Manson and I followed queer artists on MySpace. These people led me to finding other drag artists, and then I dressed up in drag for a school talent show and did a choreographed performance with some friends. I practiced makeup so much for it…I wanted to do it right! My performance won the talent show!

I’ve kept on doing it because it brings me joy. Any time I start to feel like it’s a chore or it’s not fun, I’ll take a break, but that isn’t super common. It gives me the perfect outlet to express a handful of my passions at once. It’s acting, performance, visual art, fashion, and sometimes I get to showcase my singing abilities too!

Laura: I like how drag performances always surprise the audience. All talents seem very welcome. What sets your performances apart from other drag performers?

Sonnei: There are definitely performers who focus heavily on a storytelling component, and I’m one of them. Any time I perform a number, my focus is to share a narrative, whether that includes an actual plot line, or by choosing a song with a strong message and acting out the lyrics with my body.

You’ll likely never see me just performing a song because the song is fun. I always take lyrics and personal experiences into play. I consider myself a performance artist and a storyteller who happens to use drag as a medium. I also write poetry, sing, dance, act, and dabble in comedic presentation through the art of clowning. It doesn’t necessarily make me unique, but my presentation is a culmination of the thirty years of life I’ve lived, so nobody else shares my exact point of view

Laura: How often do you get to perform? Is it hard to find gigs/paying gigs?

Sonnei: Portland is actually on the verge of over-saturation with drag. There is no shortage of opportunities and most of them pay something. Some gigs are very lucrative with tips, especially if the audience is feeling whatever you’re doing. That said, I’ve never done this for the money, but, fortunately, I break even quite often.

Laura: Do you have long-term goals with drag?

Sonnei: I’d eventually like to travel with it. My biggest dream has always been pursuing my singing and music, but drag has been right next to that. It would be really magical to me to do a more thoughtful combination of the two. My goals seem to change by the day. Some days I’m like, let’s kick this into high gear and I’ll be on RuPaul’s Drag Race! And others I just want to go to clown college and travel with a circus! [laughs] 

Laura: Portland seems like a nice place to blend the two. Does the culture of the town you’re in impact the drag culture much? What was it like in Utah?

Sonnei: The drag community that my friends and I built in Utah was a very extreme counter culture. Lots of performers were processing things like leaving the LDS church [The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints] and doing political numbers about topics like sexism and freedom. 

Portland has a lot of different bubbles and sub-scenes within the overall drag community, but for the most part the scene is very conceptual and highly art focused—less about just being beautiful and sparkly. People here are very sensitive about offending others, which is good, but I sometimes miss the chaotic and raging art that happened in Utah…it wasn’t politically incorrect or offensive in that regard, but it definitely needed a trigger warning at times.

Laura: That makes total sense. I take it was cathartic for you? Did you grow up in the LDS faith?

Sonnei: I actually didn’t. But I grew up in a rural town in central Utah, so it was a heavy influence no matter what your beliefs were.

Laura: I like how you said drag is for everyone. I really feel that. The drag shows I have seen have done a beautiful job of being inclusive. That being said, are there blind spots you have experienced or noticed in the culture? Where do cis women fit into it? Or do they?

Sonnei: It really depends on the group of people. And I would say individuals within communities have vastly different views from one to another on this. 

I was in San Francisco in 2012 the first time I saw a cis woman doing femme drag. When I started my show in Salt Lake City, there were a few AFAB (assigned female at birth) individuals who would come to the shows in really amazing clothes and makeup, so I asked one person if she would be interested in performing. She was the first cis woman in our show and it sparked a huge wave of diversifying the scene. We even eventually had a straight man who performed with us! So, as much as I’d like to say women have just as much of a right to be in drag, there are certainly many people who don’t feel that way--cis women end up having a lot of the same misogyny to deal with as they do in the rest of their lives, but it’s presented differently. Some gay men and other queer folks are very protective of their spaces. I’d say someone’s sexual orientation unfortunately comes into play also…i.e., a queer woman is going to be more accepted in drag than a straight woman would be.

I personally feel it boils down to respect. Sometimes straight people come into queer spaces with a loud sense of entitlement. My opinion is that, if you are a spectator, you should observe quietly and tread lightly. A lot can be learned just by listening.

Laura: It seems that drag offers the world a wide array of important lessons about being true to yourself, being creative, sharing your talents and skills, and being subversive. How has drag helped you personally?

Sonnei: For some people it's who we always are. Accepting our identities and allowing them to flourish is the best thing for the soul. I have very early memories of the joy I felt dressing in my sister’s clothes or even Halloween costumes. I took it very seriously as a kid. I insisted on having costumes nobody else would have! I dressed as my teacher in sixth grade and she loved it. In fact, everyone loved it, until they realized I was queer. 

So that’s a hard question to answer, but when I started doing drag with other people as a grown up and felt the magic of the community, I started to thrive. I stopped doing it for a while in my mid-twenties because I was feeling judged and not accepted in the dating realm (things have changed, but not as much as you’d think). During that time, I became deeply depressed. I lost my social circle, my community. But then, my best friend from high school moved to town and we were both feeling angsty. We wanted to take out our frustration on cis gay men who found us flamboyant types undesireable. So, we’d go to the club in nightmarish outfits and makeup. At that point, I realized how important expressing myself through the medium of drag was for me. It allowed me to have a voice, to protest, to meddle in the creation of alternate universes through characters on stage…I feel like drag helps me every single day because it’s who I am.